A Relational Approach to Risk: Beyond Checklists and Control

In most services, “risk assessment” still means a checklist. We’re trained to ask the right questions — “Do you have a plan?”, “Have you done this before?”, “What’s means are available?” — as though risk can be contained by information. But risk isn’t static. It lives and breathes in relationships.

A relational approach to risk asks something different:How might my way of being with this person influence their sense of safety, hope, or connection? Am I relating in a way that opens space for trust, or am I unknowingly repeating the very patterns that make them feel more unsafe or unseen?

Risk as a Relational Dynamic

When someone is distressed, it’s easy for professionals to slip into one of three familiar stances:

• Controlling – tightening boundaries to keep the person safe

• Rescuing – taking responsibility and stepping in

• Dismissing – retreating or referring on for our own comfort

Each stance makes sense in the moment — sometimes, taking control or rescuing is what’s needed. But if these are our only moves, we risk repeating the very dynamics that sustain long-term risk.

If a person experiences professionals as always taking over, how will they ever learn to trust themselves again?If they are repeatedly dismissed, why would they reach out next time?

Being Predictive, Not Reactive

A relational stance to risk is not about doing less. It’s about being more thoughtful and predictive about how the person may experience us when they are often feeling pretty alone and unsupported. We ask:

• How might this interaction shape the person’s willingness to seek help in the future?

• Am I adding to their sense of powerlessness, or supporting agency and connection?

• What pattern are we co-creating right now?

Holding Risk Together

Risk, like trust, is something we hold together. It requires presence, compassion, and reflection rather than a perfect form or tick-box. The 5R’s framework can guide us to stay curious about what’s happening between us and the person, not just within them.

Ultimately, a relational approach to risk isn’t about control or compliance. It’s about cultivating safety through connection — so people don’t just survive the moment, but learn that being in relationship can itself be safe enough to risk living.